At that very moment I decided to step into love…
(but it didn’t happen overnight).
I remember beating myself up day after day, month after month.
How could I prepare for a bodybuilding show for 8 months and stay on “plan” with my food/exercise the entire time, but as soon as that show was done I was the first one lined up in the buffet line with nearly 8 plates full of food in front of me (and yes, I ate them all).
The negative talk crept in deeper and deeper as the days went on.
“You shouldn’t be doing this.”
“Well….today is my cheat day after all, I’ve worked so hard, I deserve this.”
“This is going to set you so far back.”
“I can just do extra cardio tomorrow to burn some of this off, right?”
“Am I even going to be able to see my abs after this binge?”
These disordered thoughts were so toxic and here is how I broke the cycle…
✨I realized that life is too short to be consumed in food/body/exercise and not give a damn about anything or anyone else. I was losing out on vacations and precious moments with loved ones and that was not the life I saw for myself.
✨I realized that I was jeopardizing my intimate relationship because thoughts of my food/body consumed me and that is all I talked about.
✨I started realizing what it was costing me to maintain what I thought was once “healthy”. I was so worn out and energetically depleted.
So, it was at this moment that I stepped into love. I had been living in this fear space for so long and I was so scared. I wasn’t sure if I could ever change or let go of all the rules that had been created from fear around food/body but I started showing up for myself and leading each day with love, light, and compassion.
It’s time for you to do the same babe. Start showing up for YOU. No one else. Meet yourself with so much love, light and compassion.
Tag women in your life that needs to hear this message. 💜